Why Parental Rescuing Behavior Harms Kids (And How To Avoid It)

Despite the best of intentions, modern parents are ushering their children by the droves into emotional mousetraps.  Caught between a parent’s own desire for enmeshment and rapidly shifting societal norms, children are left ill-equipped to navigate the spectrum of their own emotions.  The trends tell a story of children and adolescents, who are facing suicidal ideation and behavior; children who are medicated by the truckloads; children who are – for loss of a better word, unraveling.

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A Few Things I Learned About Myself As A Mom On Mother’s Day

When I am not swimming in laundry or dirty dishes, I like to take a few minutes to reflect on who I am as a mother.  Because I am always trying to stay afloat, this rarely happens.  Until this year.  This year I celebrated and stole moments to silence the chaos and this is what I found out about myself as mother:

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10 Ways to Reward Children Without Food

I will be the first to admit I reward my children with food on the occasion.  I love to find reasons to celebrate.  Ask my mother-in-law.  When she visits I find ways to spice up the day.  Anything and everything can be a reason.  You made it here in one piece – let’s celebrate! You recovered from jet lag – let’s celebrate! You survived our household for an entire week – let’s celebrate! Going for coffee (my mother-in-law) and tea (myself) is a primary example. And with the kids in tow, it may be a hot chocolate from our favorite chocolate store or an ice cream from our favorite chocolate store.  Yes, they are one in the same.  Because I like to frequently celebrate I have to find alternative ways to party with my children.  A cupcake every time they smile wouldn’t be conducive to healthy living so I opt out on the food and zero in on the quality time.

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Why This Statement Will Change The Way You Parent

Have any of your children ever made a mistake?  I don’t mean an I-accidently-stepped-on-the-dog mistake.  I mean a big, nasty mistake that left intense emotional repercussions.  A fallout you had to pick up and show them how to manage.  Maybe Susie hit her brother.  Maybe Timmy excluded a friend purposefully and hurtfully from play.  Maybe Michael didn’t let Janet be part of his little singing group.  Maybe Marie lashed out at Donnie and told him a hundred reasons why she didn’t love him.  You get my drift.

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Bullying: The Who, What, When And Why

Bullying and its offshoot, Cyberbullying are two terms, which carry heavy weight.  Since Columbine, Americans are quick to identify what is disproportionately normative behavior in childhood development as something sinister in its origins.  With the advent of social media, one phrase misplaced can create a tidal wave of social destruction.  Children are learning about boundaries in a world that cannot contain them.   Before you jump to conclusions that your child may be a victim of a bully or the one busy doing the bullying look for signs that may help point you in the correct direction.

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What We Sacrifice For The Sake of Perfection

Waiting for perfection to arrive, we sacrifice.  We sacrifice without knowing.  We sacrifice daily.  We lose out to the unattainable leaving ourselves frustrated and stressed in the pursuit.  Is this the road trip we want to take in life?  One of the things I love most in life is an unplanned road trip.  Maybe it is just another paradox of my life.  I love the unexpected but I want to plan the unexpected.  I don’t want it to creep up on me in my sleep.  I try to constantly find ways to control my daily existence.  Strange, I know.  But I am human and I do.  And isn’t that what control is all about?  Wanting a world to respond in perfect order.  Like all the time.  24/7.  I sacrifice everyday in small ways and large as a slave to perfection.  Chances are perfection is pulling you away from the very thing you want most out of life.  Waiting for perfection to arrive:       

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How To Get Hygge With It

As you can tell by my title I, in my ignorance, pronounced hygge as “higgy” because that is what you do when you don’t have a firm or loose grasp on the Danish language.  The Danes, who originated the concept, actually pronounce it, “hoo-guh.”  The term, with no direct English translation, refers to feeling cozy in a manner that creates contentment. Think of words that may bring the Danish spirit of hygge alive in your heart: relaxation, comfort, hug, console and you will be that much closer to the idea of “hoo-ugh!”

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I’m Not Waiting Anymore

I am not waiting anymore.  I am not waiting for another study to tell me how to behave.  I am not waiting for pharmaceutical companies to finally act in an ethical manner.  I am not waiting for major food corporations to take responsibility for their wrongdoing.  I am not waiting for someone else to give me the answers because I already have them.  We all have them.  However, we are led to believe otherwise.

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My Personal Beliefs As A Former Clinician

If you follow my work; you should be aware, be very aware of the angle from which I write.  I want to be transparent. If you are taking time out of your busy day to read something I have written I want you to know first and foremost I am grateful.  Second, I believe you deserve my truth and if my truth doesn’t jive with yours; you have the opportunity to always walk away.

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5 Reasons To Support Organic Farmers Now

 

 

We make a choice as a family to buy organic groceries whenever possible.  We want to support the farmers who care for our planet and our health. I am willing to pay a little more at the store in hopes that I don’t pay the price with our health later.  Does eating organics ensure we will never become ill?  No.  But I would rather invest in prevention than in recovery.

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